Better Watch Out

Wanna put her in the mood? Watch a horror movie. She's like twice our age. I really don't think it's gonna happen. She's here. You are breathtaking. Now don't stay up and watch scary movies, okay? It'll give you nightmares of gun. So what do you wanna do? Why can't you just leave me alone? You're such a jerk. Don't hang up on me. Hello, Sydney. Uh, hi. Who is this? It's your killer host. My name is Parker, your resident horror fanatic. I'm Caroline, Scaredy Scream Queen. I'm Ian, Scary Movie Skeptic. And welcome to. What's your favorite scary movie? What's your favorite scary movie is a horror film podcast where we're on a journey to find our favorite scary movie one at a time.

Whether you hate them or love them, join us and discover yours. Spoilers ahead, so plan your movie screening every weekend before the episode release. Jingle jingle, motherfuckers. Yep. Greetings, seasons, greetings. Seasons, greetings. Happy holidays to all and to all a good night. Happy hoes. Happy hoeing, motherfuckers. Oh my god. This is just off to a start. Um, so you know, you guys, it is December. It is time for holiday cheer. And no matter what you celebrate, no matter who you are, one, I love you. I love you. So I'm glad you're listening. And let's spread a little joy and watch some holiday movies. Uh, starting out this week with the the requested. Wow, highly requested. We take requests.

Parker, where do we take requests from? We take requests from our patrons at patreon.com slash scary moviepod. Yeah, we are in a close, tight-knit chat on Discord with all of our patrons where you can submit requests for what movies you want us to watch on this podcast. So this movie was it's particularly requested by our patron Blake. So, Blake, happy holidays from me to you. Little stocking stuffer for you, Blake. Well, my stocking has been stuffed because we, like I said, watched Better Watch Out for this. And uh boy do I have some emotions coursing through my veins right now. Uh Better Watch Out was originally titled Safe Neighborhood. I think good call on changing the name.

Great call. And it came out wide release in 2017, so a mere three years ago. It was directed by Chris Peckover and was co-written by Peckover and Zach Kahn. Alright, we have Olivia Dejong as Ashley. Ian's giggling. Uh she was in The Sisterhood of Night from 2014 and The Visit in 2015. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Why why is Ian giggling? Is he thinking she's cute? Dejong. Oh. Dejong. Duh. De Slong. Uh we also have Levi Miller as Luke or Lucas. He was in Pan in 2015, which like 1000% makes sense. And a wrinkle in Time in 2018. Very cute little kid. I don't like the word wrinkle. Great, Parker. Um, Ed Oxenbold is the role of Garrett.

He was in the visit in 2015. Um, and the Schlong of Boyfriends. Alex McKick as Ricky and Daker Montgomery as Jeremy. Now, are you a fan of the uh hit series Stranger Things? Season one. Uh I started it and ashamedly was too scared back in 2015, 2016 before this journey started, so I might need to re-watch that. Well, the performer who plays Jeremy, whose first name I do not want to make a fool of myself like you just did by saying, plays the very hot, uh mulleted lifeguard. Uh, I believe his name is Billy in season four, so and three. So I don't know how many seasons there have been. In the past season. So he is quite the hot tee.

Also, worth noting, the parents are played by Patrick Warburton and Virginia Madsen. Patrick Warburton mean kronk. Obvi. Oh my god. The poison. Love that man. Poison. Poison for Cusco. He popped up on the screen, and I was like, that guy. He's also in Scream 3, which you might recognize from our podcast. And do you did you recognize at all Virginia Madsen? Uh seemed like a typical housewife with a drinking problem. Damn. Okay, Caroline, read yourself. Uh Virginia Madsen plays the iconic role of Helen Lyle from Candyman. Oh, her. Yeah, very hot. Yeah, back in the day. I mean, she's still a sassy hot mom. She's wearing that little red number. The IMDB summary reads, quote, on a quite suburban street, a babysitter must defend a 12-year-old boy from intruders, only to discover it's far from a normal home invasion.

The Rotten Tomatoes average critic score is a 6.9 out of ten. And the average audience rating? Well, it's seven out of ten. The critics' consensus is quote carried by its charismatic young cast. Wow, cheeky Rotten Tomatoes adorably. I think it was enjoyable to watch. Um, not like cinematically groundbreaking by any ways. I feel like this is the horror version of Home Alone. Or the Christmas version of Scream uh Scream. Scream. What'd Scream ever do to you? Yeah, it was interesting. Interesting. It was uh better quality um than I thought it would be. Why? Just uh the overall shots and the like aesthetic of the the cinematography was was good. But you thought it was gonna be bad?

I don't know. When when you get like um hot take, when you when you attach a holiday to a a movie, sometimes it can cause the quality to oh, you know, plummet. Uh-oh, I'm sending this to Hallmark, shots have been fired. So uh I was pleasantly surprised um by the quality of the film. I just was in awe half of the movie, thinking this house is beautiful. Oh yeah, it's a nice house. The hallway upstairs, very wide. Beautiful stairway, the living room, very open. I wrote in my notes the doorknobs higher than that girl. Yeah. She was having to reach overhead to get those doorknobs. And that's it. Check out this movie on shutter. No, I'm just waiting in case anybody wants to ask what I thought.

Oh, Parker. What did you think about Better Watch Out? Oh, thank you for asking. That's very kind of you. You know, I always like to start my reviews with something positive. It's always good to have something positive. So that one moment, the twist moment of the movie when he hits her in the face and she falls down the stairs, was shocking. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. You know, yeah. Keep going. I want to hear her thoughts. Well, that's the only positive thing I have to say about it. So I really thought this movie, no offense to Blake, who we're gifting this episode to, but I thought this movie was one, boring. I thought it was two, really, really a stretch to even call it a horror movie.

And three, I thought, you want to know something that really steams my broccoli, Caroline? What? When movies begin with just really crass and unnecessarily just like obscene language and things, just to make you know, like, wow, we're not like other Christmas movies. We're a cool Christmas movie. And it bothered me, not, I mean, I'm no prude, but the way that came off, in my opinion, was just some strangely like homophobic language. One of the very first things that happens in the movie is, you know, some little boy slaps the head off of a girl's snowman and she says, You buttfucker. And I thought, nobody even says that. And then just a few scenes later, the husband comes in with a beautiful collection of ornaments.

Robert, turn that shit off. It's giving me a migraine. Yes, uh, darling. My ornaments here are conspicuously missing from the tree. We're not putting those on the tree. You're sure you've never sucked another man's cock? Not even in college. Not some lost weekend, fishing trip, secret special friend. Ever? Not that I can recall. Because honestly, Robert, this is so Meterosexual? That's not even the word. It's metro. Metro sexual. A lot of like gay things. I need a drink. Okay, we get it that you're so edgy and cool, better watch out. But like, why are you just like pushing this all off onto weird gay jokes? I don't know, didn't sit well with me. Yeah. Yeah. You know, at a certain point you just have to like agree that this young child has some things to work out in therapy.

And then pretty much everything after that was not surprising or horrific in any way. The real question about this movie is it nature or nurture? Oh, it's nature. His parents seemed, they seemed like kind of pissy, but they seemed like fun parents. You know, he has that moment in the middle of the film where he says, My mom used to come in and hold me until I fell asleep every night, and then she just stopped. And to me, that's just like, well, honey, you're growing up. You can't stay a child forever, and you need to accept that. If you want your if you want Ashley to see you as a man, like you have been this whole time, like you can't pick and choose.

So I think it's nature because you know, I think he's just got some problems and he's having a little hard time adjusting, but nobody's causing him to be crazy. I think those cool parents have a little bit more in their closet, if you know what I mean. Swingers. Maybe you know, there's something else that's happening to that little boy. I mean, the parents seem cool, but what went wrong, you know? I don't know. You want to know the other thing that I think kind of irks me about this film? To me, it's so bizarre. Because, like, all of the marketing was similar to what I was just complaining about. That it it's it's so twisted, it's so disturbing, it's so edgy.

And really, to me, it just seemed like some, you know, there's like a slew of horror that celebrates being a young boy. A lot of Stephen King stuff, like it really celebrates being a young boy. Uh, Stranger Things, like I just mentioned, and there's a lot of stuff in those that's like being the young dweeb, and then, you know, showing the bullies what's up, you know, either by physically, you know, overpowering them or like growing up and becoming cooler than the the bullies. And so to me, this movie was just like some strange combination of that nostalgia for when, you know, being a young boy, you can just do what you want and it's so pure, and nobody's judging you, and this fantasy of like the hot babysitter, and I'm gonna take what I want, and he's never punished.

He just, there is never much pushback to him. He just gets to kill and terrorize and molest these people, and then at the end, it's only slightly hinted that you know something bad might happen. And if you watch past the first couple of credits, it ends with him telling his mom, like, wow, I'm really uh worried about Ashley. We should go to the hospital to check on her. And so it's just like this weird, like, and even at the end it switches. There's a weird switch from him being horrible and you thinking that something bad's gonna happen to this like playful part where he's on the roof trying to hide that he's knocking over the lights from his parents.

And so it's like we're supposed to be rooting for this boy who's absolutely horrible and deplorable, and I don't understand it. It actually made me feel really uncomfortable. Well, I think that's part of like the edginess of his character. Yeah, but to what end? Like, there's no theme to that. There's there's really in my brain, like, what makes a horror movie? First of all, there's no suspense to this movie. I mean, yes, there's a twist, and I'm sure it fooled me the first time I saw this, but besides that, like, none of this action sequences ever surprised me. There were a couple of jump scares that were fine, but like, to what end is he horrible?

We never, if we're supposed to hate him so much because he's this crazy villain, and if Ashley's supposed to be like the character we empathize with, I don't think she is because there's no moment of victory. And I like a dark movie and I like a dark ending, but like I said, like you have to have some sort of payoff. Like martyrs is a torturous experience, but we've talked about before by that by the end you get to the end of this harrowing journey, and there's like this kind of epiphany, you know? I feel I feel like there is a a a payoff. It's subtle, but I feel like it's important that when she survived in on the stretcher and flips him off, that she has fucked him.

Hot. So I I I feel like she gets hers. Not in the traditional leading lady role, but she's still gonna get hers. But like I said, we don't even know because the movie, first of all, it ends on the shot of his mom hugging him. And, you know, maybe I don't know, we see what happens when white men, young boys end up in court, you know. Uh, not a lot of good. But also, um, like I said, like it uh it ultimately ends on him saying, let's go to the hospital to check on her, which I would assume would mean if there's a sequel or something. It's supposed to, you know, imply that he's gonna go try and kill her at the hospital.

So I don't know. Like, I don't really think there is a meaningful moment of victory in this movie if Ashley is truly the hero of the movie. I think what's weird to me, this like strange, like patriarchal, misogynistic thing, is I think that Lucas is the the hero of the movie. And that's that's not doesn't sit well in my tummy. Plus, it's boring. Like I said, I was not not often scared. Caroline, were you surprised at all by the twists of this film? Yeah, but it was so early on that like I think I just checked out once I knew that it was all his plan. And like they the rest of the movie, like, yes, they tried to keep it interesting with the boyfriend showing up, but ultimately it was just this like deranged kid who was.

I mean, I enjoyed the home alone home alone testing theory of the paint can. Yeah, that was funny. That was like laughable, but then everything after that, not very memorable. Ian, were you surprised at all by the the turns of the film? No, not at all. Yeah. Almost to the extent that like the second boyfriend showing up even was a stretch for me. Like, totally could have left that part out. So you think it was too long? I think the I think the the giveaway was given away too soon. They could have had a lot more fun before we knew that it was just these kids. I didn't feel I actually I'm typically the the snore fest on long movies, but this didn't feel long to me.

Hmm. Yeah, I just thought it was super boring. I even thought that a lot of it, and I rarely complain about this, just didn't make a lot of sense. Like, I mean, I guess it does in hindsight when you realize that he's orchestrated this whole thing, but some of the choices they make, like leaving the attic or later in the film. Um I don't know. I just like I don't believe a lot of it as well as not liking it. And I think that um, yeah, it just gets a little masochistic in a way that isn't like a fun, fun way of watching horror. Um I think that the second boyfriend, I was just like really bored.

And I mean, the nice it's a nice kill. It's interesting he made him write a little suicide note. That's kind of interesting. But them being taped up to their chairs was a lot. I mean, when he kills his friend with the shotgun and then stabs the babysitter, I assume, in the neck with the knife, like that's that was like a dark, edgy, like exciting thing that I was like, wow, that's really twisted and wicked. But um, you know, it just the dots weren't connected beyond that for me. So so we've talked about thematics. Did y'all have any thoughts on like the performances? Uh I mean I thought um Ashley. I thought Ashley did a good job.

Yeah. I I thought she was okay. Um I thought the the friend was also pretty good. Um I don't I don't I didn't care for what's I mean Luke. I thought Luke's acting was a little forced. Yeah, I'm on the same page. I thought Ashley and Garrett were wonderful, and they're the two stars. Of another horror movie that I love called The Visit, and it's great. And I agree that I thought Luke was really grating. I don't know how they could have found anyone better for that role unless the role was rewritten in a way. Well, I mean, I think the writing isn't great in this movie, so there you go. Let's send it in for another another Passover, another revision, and maybe we'll like it.

Like Luke as a character was kind of boring, and therefore I think the portrayal of him was also boring. Yeah. Now let's talk a little bit about the the kills. Did you think the kills were exciting? Did you uh think that they had resonance? And maybe which one is your most memorable murder of all of them? Oh, a paint can to the face, obviously. Yeah. And did you feel like that? So that was kind of the longest sequence of a kill in the movie. The rest are kind of quick. Did you think that that was suspenseful and did it have tension, or did you just enjoy the joke of it? I think I enjoyed the joke of it because I mean it's fun, first of all.

It relates to another movie, holiday movie, which is fun. But I also to an extent did not see it coming because you know we have this like climax of her getting away, grabbing the gun, coming in, thinking that everything's gonna come to a halt, and then it just goes forward anyways, and there are multiple ways for him to get out of that, but he doesn't, and it just happens. Yeah. And the gore, I appreciated the artistic interpretation of it with the paint and the blood coming in, it's like this bright yellow splatter. I am going to uh I hate to be the naysayer on every single one of these things because I think you're right that it is exciting in the buildup, and the kind of trick of her finally getting out and being like, stop, and then him just tossing it and nailing him in the face is fun.

But I I mentioned this on my episode, my review of Freaky with Julianne last week, that there is kind of excitement and euphoria, he says in this movie, scares release dopamine, which is the same thing that's released when you're aroused. Ooh. But um there's just as much joy in the aftermath of a kill, and a kill that can either show you something truly nasty afterwards, or if it's a cutaway, you know, done right, the kind of thrill of the jar, the jarring nature of what you just saw. I thought that this one, you know, it was fun, the the blood dripping down into the pools of paint, but at the same time, they keep saying, oh, his head just exploded like this, and oh, his his head is gone and it's mushed and blah blah.

And it is very purposeful that you never see his head afterwards. They purposefully uh position things so you can't see it. And you know, if that's a product of budget, that's fine, but like it just it irked me a little bit that they're talking about how massacred this guy's head was, and they just they don't show it to us. Like, even cutting away when it happens, like cut to it later or something. You can't tell me how cool something is and not show it to me. I guess I would have to go with the uh I would have to go with the paint can too, I think. I I didn't love it, but these are all pretty weak murders in my book, so um uh I I I would have to go with it.

Yeah, and I think in a home alone style movie, what do you got if you don't got the murders? I'm just so frustrated. I'm sorry, listeners. I hate to hate things, but you know, I'm gonna go with Garrett, the best friend, dying because I do think he was my favorite character. I thought he was really funny, and he seemed, of course, I mean, maybe it's a different time nowadays, but I don't know any people that age who are actually drinking and smoking. And you know, I'm sure there are, but it seemed a little wild to me in this kind of affluent neighborhood that they're in. But I did think he was funny and had the most empathy of all the characters.

I think that, like we discussed earlier, Ashley was really good, and that she was able to lead the movie with kind of like a fierce confidence, and also like you could see a lot of distress in her eyes, even when she was scared or uh uh trying to stand up to Luke. But I think that Garrett was just really good and kind of the devastation after he's blown away, blown literally through the air by that shotgun, was really wrenching, in my opinion. I thought that that was like a glimpse of the emotional potential of this movie that it then kind of just casts off. So that is my most memorable murder. Now, you guys tell me, tell me, tell me.

On a scary scale, one to five, how would you rate Better Watch Out? I gotta give it another two this week. Yeah, I give it a solid two. Was not scared. I mean, the scariest part was this beautiful home getting wrecked with blood. How dare I give a two-two? Two two? A two-two. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. I'm gonna give it a little bit lower. I'm gonna give it a a one and a half because I think that the scare for me is purely just how kind of upsetting it is, in my opinion. Like, I don't think you could show this to someone with a weak heart, you know, they might be just very sad and etc.

But um I think that the gore wasn't particularly impressive or disturbing. I think besides the fact that you just have what feels like to me uh a set of filmmakers living a strange fantasy through a young boy, I think that there's not much to be scared of. And if you're gonna have a home invasion, I feel like scaring people, not a hard ask. And there was just no tension to the home invasion in the first half of the movie. No tension. I was never scared for them. So would you give Better Watch Out a smash or a slash? On a regular day, I would give it a slash, but if you're like super bored, it could be a smash compared to others.

Is that acceptable? You know, sure. I have to give it a smash. Wow! Yeah, I mean, not a hard smash by any means. I mean it's there's there's some issues, but I I kinda liked the um um, you know, we've seen some home invasion movies. I feel like this was a it wasn't a typical plot line of this weird kid obsessed with his babysitter. It's kinda it's obviously weird, but it's different. Here's what I would love to do with this movie. I would love to trick someone who doesn't think they're watching a horror movie into watching this movie. I mean, to what end? It's it's so far from being a horror movie. Like, I want to trick someone into thinking that they're watching like a like goofy Christmas movie into like, oh, did you kind of like that?

Maybe we should watch some other horror movies together. Uh, you know maybe not stardom on Gremlins. Right. I uh I'm gonna need y'all to get that out of the system before our holiday programming is done because this is not a house where we condone Gremlins' hate. Um no, Caroline, I think that's a horrible, wretched idea. I think they're you know you're no. Um why, Partners? Like, okay, Parker, because before we started this journey into scary movie knowledge, I feel like if we were in our apartment in New York and you would be like, Oh, come watch this Christmas movie with me, I would start this movie and be like very focused and into it, trying to pick your up what the plot lines would be, and then at the end you would be like, ha, tricked you.

I think that I have two reasons. One is something not super applicable, but I feel like anytime we've discussed like entry horror movies or gateway horror movies on this podcast, the way I try and hook people is through fun. Like, this is you can have fun watching a horror movie and watching death and murder. That's how I usually try and get people, but I guess that's kind of beside the point. I think for this movie, why I wouldn't do it is because I think that the the disturbing parts of this movie are pretty heavy, and like like that last bit of bit of killing with his friend Garrett and the babysitter, like I think that's pretty upsetting.

And I don't think that it's fun enough to deserve that. And so, yes, I do think the twist of him being a little brat, a little murderous brat, is good, and like I get what you're saying that it would be a fun shock, but also like it would be given away that it was a horror movie before that. Like, if there was some way for it to not be a home invasion and then he's bad, if it was like everything's good, but they're little clues, maybe. But I mean it gives away that it's trying to be a horror movie pretty early on. I don't think you could trick anyone with it. Yeah, but once you're on the couch, you know, with a little popcorn, you're into it, you know.

I probably would have stuck around the whole time if you would have tricked me into watching this. Well, you stuck around for all of Gremlins, so um I'm going to give, I think no surprise to anyone on this podcast, I'm gonna give BetterWatch out a slash. And I'm reminded of one of my favorite quotes from Anna in the Apocalypse, which we reviewed on Patreon last Friday, so go check that out. But there is a scene where he said one of the characters asked another character, fuck Mary Kill, and then says, like, zombie Beyoncé, zombie Rihanna, Rihanna, and zombie one other person I can't remember. And she goes, Smiley Cyrus. Yeah, and she goes, kill them all, they're zombies.

And that's the mentality I have for better watch out. Fuck Mary Kill, no, killing it all. So I just I wonder how Parker really feels. Yeah, I didn't love it. Didn't love it. I was pretty disappointed that I I uh no Blake, thank you so much for recommending this movie to us. It was such a an exciting journey getting to pick something that I wouldn't typically Parker hates you and all of your recommendations. No, I've never, I've never um I was going to say loved anyone more, but Blake, we don't know each other that well. Back off. But um, Blake, I appreciate this. And he recommended two very good movies with this that just aren't holiday stuff that we'll probably get to in the new year.

So, Blake, thank you. All right, thanks, Blake. All right, so you guys let me know if is there any adjustment, any change, any uh exciting uh twists to what's your favorite scary movie? No, Hellhouse is still the premiere. Premier. Sticking with Sinister. And a surprise for our listeners here, but no surprise to our patrons. My favorite scary movie right now is Anna and the Apocalypse, which we watched last week on one of our Patreon exclusive episodes. This movie is not my favorite scary movie. In fact, I would say it's probably one of my least favorite scary movies. You know, it's watchable. I'm not gonna say that. If you're really bored and you have a party going on, sure, put it on.

Whatever. It's free on Shutter. But watch it before you watch Texas Chainsaw. Yeah. Oh very watchable. You guys, you're trash. Y'all are more trash than Better Watch Out is trash. Parker's trash. This movie is better than Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I'm trash. You're trash. We're all trash. You know, it's it's definitely better than the cursive law you're owned. I think we can all agree on that. Alright, you guys. You know, this has been such a holly-jolly hell of a time. That had a good ring to it. I'm gonna save that in the noggin. And I look forward to doing it again next week. But you know, if you can't wait until next Monday, oh, you can head on over to patreon.com slash slash slash scary movie pod, where this Friday we have a brand new review of 2006's Black Christmas.

And I know we're all just itching to talk about Black Christmas again this year. So go check that out. But next Monday we will be returning for our ultimate holiday episode, something that I'm just dying to watch. Gremlins. Did I ever tell you that I watched Gremlins when I was really young and I had nightmares about it for like several years after? Good. I've been watching Gremlins since I was a kid, and I would purposefully show it to other kids to scar them. Terrifying. I know. There was one girl, and we would all go to oh my god, Ian, I just saw the reflection of your hand in that window, and I was like, uh, there was this one girl, and we would all hang out at her house like every week, me and my friends, when I was in elementary school and high school, and I was just the one that her mom was like always like Parker, turn out your pockets.

What kind of trash movies have you brought into my house? And because she just had she had a real vendetta against horror, and would get like I would get kicked out of that house if I brought if I brought something she didn't approve of. Short-sighted people need to expand their minds. All right. Watch Hopper Parker, he's a troublemaker. Oh, exactly. Hide your babysitters. If you want a good babysitter movie, go watch the babysitter on Netflix. That movie rules. It's way funnier and way uh more satisfying. Alright. Until next time, you can head on over to Apple Podcasts and leave us a rating and a review to help us spread the scary word of what's your favorite scary movie.

My name is Parker. You can find me on Instagram, Twitter, and Letterboxd at Parker Del Rey. My name is Caroline. You can find me on Instagram at Carol ManaFesto. My name's Ian, and you can find me on YouTube at Life Nomading. Oh, back on the old bullshit again, I see. Back on it. Well, you guys always grill me if I don't include a promo. Gotta let the people find you, Ian. Looking forward to some new house reno content. Ooh. You can find what's your favorite scary movie on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at ScarymoviePod. You can find all of our rad bonus content on Patreon.com slash scary moviepod. And you can find all things what's your favorite scary movie at scarymoviepod.com and send us requests of your own at scary moviepod at gmail.com.

Bye, you guys. I hope you have a festive holiday until next week. Happy holidays.